and you know, it doesn't get easier - it is just different. Really different.
This day, 9 years ago, my mother died and in 17 days time, Bronte will be 9.
June is a difficult month for me...mum died on the 1st of June, Dad died on the 14th of June 4 years after mum. Bronte's birthday is on the 18th of June - we buried Dad on her 4th birthday...
I wanted to share this letter that mum wrote to us a while before she died. It isn't dated but I can tell that it was amended not long before she got ill as she inserted a reference to my 'wee girl'. She knew I was having a girl and loved the name Bronte.
In it she mentions names - Bert is my father, Christine, Stephen, Mark and Michael are my siblings, Catherine is me (Kate). Joseph, Alicia, Patty and Leonie are my brother and sisters in laws and Stanley is my husband.
Her 'special little ones', Christian, Daniel, Morgan, Imogen, Samuel, Zachary and Caitlin are all her grandchildren. Then she came along later and added 'Catherine and Stan's wee girl' that was Bronte as I was pregnant with her.
Anyway, the letter was read out by my sister Christine at mum's funeral - none of us knew about this letter until Christine read it out - she kept the secret to herself and it really made me cry. Here it is in full but if you want to read it in mum's original handwriting, click on the two photos below...
To my dearly beloved family, I thank my God for each and every-one of you and I am grateful for the time He has given us together.And that, folks, says it all.... I miss you so much mum!
He has blessed my life with the gift of you my darling Bert, you have been with me through thick and thin (mainly thick!) you have always been my anchor, you have given me love and support all our years together. No regrets Bert, we have both done the best we could. Remember, I have always loved you.
Christine, Stephen, Mark, Michael and Catherine, how I love each and everyone of you my precious children who have been a joy and delight to me, each of you have given your own pleasure and pain as I am sure I have given to you all. This is family, this is life, this is love.
Through you, my children, you have bought to our family an extra dimension and diversity which has enriched us all or could if we let it - Joseph, Alicia, Patty, Leonie and Stanley who have tried to adapt to the Geikowski way. (I myself am still trying) keep on perservering my extended family the rewards will be worthwhile.
Now to my special little ones, Christian, Daniel, Morgan, Imogen, Samuel, Zachary, Caitlin and Catherine and Stan's wee girl. I cannot find the words to express how much I love you all and treasure the joy of holding and kissing each of your beautiful faces. I thank you for your unconditional love. How blessed I am.
Be sad, grieve, be angry, but most important allow yourselves to feel, do not block out whatever emotions that are with you at this time or in time to come. I wish I could be with you physically to help each of you through this time. I pray that you come together as family and love, help and support eachother especially your father which saddens me the most.
I love and bless you my beloved family and thank God for all He has given me. Know that if it is possible, I will be loving and watching over you all and praying to my God to draw you closer to Him and to eachother.
God Bless
Your loving Pat, Mum and Grandma
13 comments:
K8 she sounds like an amazing woman and her love of you and family is so strong.
Many hugs going out for you
Your Mother Is Always With You
Your mother is always with you...
She's the whisper of the leaves
as you walk down the street.
She's the smell of bleach in
your freshly laundered socks.
She's the cool hand on your
brow when you're not well.
Your mother lives inside
your laughter. She's crystallized
in every tear drop...
She's the place you came from,
your first home.. She's the map you
follow with every step that you take.
She's your first love and your first heart
break....and nothing on earth can separate you.
Not time, Not space...
Not even death....
will ever separate you
from your mother....
You carry her inside of you....
- Author Unknown.
Oh k8
Sitting here with Tears streaming down my face. Your mother had a wonderful life with all her children and all her grandchildren. You can tell she was really happy.
I am so sorry that you lost her!
Big Hugs
Sue xx
oh gosh k8 that bought tears to my eyes! She sounds like an amazing woman. xox
Huge hugs to you k8. You know I am always thinking of you on days like these.
XXXXX
K
Kate, I am crying openly here reading that. Co-incidentally, I also had Bernard Fanning's 'Watch Over Me' playing as I was reading it as I had just put it on my blog. Don't know if that was a sign for you or not but it really did set the tone.
You mum sounds like an amazing woman and I'm sure she is watching over you right now.
Thank you all so so much - it means the world to me to be able to share my mother with the world - so that people KNOW she existed.
Scrivvy - I love that song so much - didn't realise that I liked Powderfinger? I better listen to more of their music I think...
Hi K8
Your Mum sounds like a very strong woman who cherished her family very much!
I hope the rest of June is kind to you xx
I know it's hard. We think it will get easier, but it doesn't. You're right that it gets different, but not easier.
The letter your mother left you all is a treasure. I hope you find comfort in it during these tough days, knowing that she is watching over you and your family, loving you from Heaven as much as you still love her.
Hugs, Caz
Oh k8 I just read this post and like others am sitting here with tears. What a wonderful Mum you had and what a wonderful letter to have to keep. I'll be thinking of you throughout June.
xxx
Oh K8 ~ what a beautiful part of your life to share.
I have always admired you as a parent and now I see where some of what you give your kids came from ~ I imagine that letter would have been so so difficult for your mother to write and for you guys to hear.
V xx
Hi Kate, Was nice to come across this letter from Pat. I had heard of it when I spoke to Stephen a few years ago, when I rang the only Geikowski in the white pages.
Lol..Suppose I should give u an idea as to who I am first, to put it all in context! I'm Mandy Gleeson's Son Christian...( Otherwise known as ur brother's son and ur nephew,when u look at it that way!*S*)
Anyway's back to the main point!
Stephen had filled me in briefly as to the situations with Pat and Bert passing and made mention Of Michael's other kids not knowing of me until a certain letter was read out at her funeral! I came across this site(ur blog) by pure spontanity, typing Geikowski in to google and came across a site with a memorial to Pat from urself! Then went on to search her whole name and hence end up here! I have spent the last cpl hours reading through some of ur blogs and have enjoyed the insight, particularly in relation to Pat and Bert!
I had always wanted to reconnect with them as a teenager, in particular Pat, I remember ringing once when I first moved to Melb. in 1995 at 17. But the phone answered and I asked for Pat and a guy said who's this and I obviously lost the nerve and never tried again, until it was to late! But I hope she'd be happy to know that I finally had the chance to read it and in her own hand writing!
I also appreciated being able to see the few photo's u have of the two of them!
I'm 29 living in Sth Melb and have a son(Jaxen) who'll be 4 on the 12th March. If u wish to get back to me at any stage My emails Linz.man@hotmail.com
Oh K8, what an amazing woman your mum must have been. Thanks for sharing, I'll be thinking of you.
sylvia xx
I remember being at the funeral, minding the boys with Joyce at the back of the room, and how sad everyone was when that letter was read out. Then your dad nearly collapsed before the hearse left - it was such a sad time but we were there to give you our love and support. So we send you our love, big hugs and lots of happy times ahead - don't dwell on the past as you can't change it, just look forward with happy memories of all the special times you shared as a family. The BBQs at your place when your parents came to visit - they were such fun times! Not all families are privileged to have known such love. Xxxxx Joan & Les (in Esperence!)
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